Clearly, one aspect of simplicity is slowing down. I am working on this with Grace and letting her be involved in my tasks, but I’m struggling. Not just because I have trouble slowing down, but also because Grace has trouble with it too! She often wants to do the next step, but we hadn’t even finished the step we were on, and so I start trying to work faster and faster to stay ahead of her. She clearly wants to help and be involved, but she wants to do everything at warp speed it seems. The question I’ve been asking myself is “how do I slow it down, bring in that spaciousness to myself, to help her???
And here is what my lifeways training has taught me about this…
It is SO important to involve our children in our work. So, I give myself a pat on the back for instinctively knowing this truth.
In terms of feeling rushed with trying to stay one step ahead of Grace, it seems like no matter how fast I go through the steps, it is never fast enough and it always ends with her having a meltdown.
Recently, I realized that there is no possible way for me to do it (cook dinner, take a shower, brush her hair…) fast enough. What could I do instead? Try and do it out of her site/without her knowing? But I couldn’t be gone for so long (and it’s hard to brush someones hair without them knowing!)…what I did instead was to slow WAY down. This was so counter-intuitive that it took me months to come up with and try. If being fast wasn’t fast enough, how could being slow be better? But so far it has been working like magic. Instead of trying to go faster, I’ve started acting like I have all the time in the world. One of the ways I did this was by talking about what I was doing and what I was seeing and what I was smelling, all in a spacious and non-rushed way. “I wonder what shows we will wear today? Oh, look, you want to wear your pink shoes! I love pink, don’t you?…”
So, moral of the story: When I think I need more time, what I really need is to slow down.
And they lived slowing, simply ever after.